6 Reasons I Understand the Shoes Off at the Door Rule Now

When I was a teenager living overseas in another country, one of the customs they had there is taking my shoes off when I went inside someone’s house.

It wasn't something I had really thought about before.

You walked into the house.

Your shoes came with you.

End of story.

Then suddenly I was living somewhere where outdoor shoes didn't belong all over the house.

Shoes came off at the door, and everybody seemed to understand this except the American teenager quietly wondering what the big deal was.

I adapted.

Then something funny happened.

I started liking it.

What first felt like somebody else's custom started making a whole lot of sense to me.

By the time I eventually had my own home, I didn't have to think twice about whether I wanted people walking across my carpet in the same shoes they'd worn through parking lots, stores, sidewalks, public bathrooms and everywhere else.

They can absolutely come into my house.

Their shoes aren't getting the same invitation.

I don't consider myself a clean freak, and I'm not standing at the door inspecting the bottom of anybody's sneakers.

I just know how I live inside my home.

I walk around without shoes.

I have carpet.

I want to be comfortable putting my bare feet on my own floor without wondering what somebody's shoe brought in my home with them.

What started as something I learned overseas eventually became one of those household habits I understood much better once the home was mine.

1. I Finally Started Thinking About Where My Shoes Had Been

This is probably the biggest one.

Most of us don't spend much time thinking about the bottom of our shoes.

We put them on, go about our day and come home.

But think about an average pair of shoes for a minute.

The grocery store.

The gas station.

A public restroom.

A parking lot.

The sidewalk.

Grass.

Mud.

Somebody's office.

Maybe a restaurant floor where half the city apparently walked before lunch.

Then those same shoes come home.

Once I actually thought about it, I couldn't unthink it.

Shoes can bring outdoor soil and dust indoors.

The EPA even recommends removing shoes before entering the home as one way to reduce tracking contaminated soil inside, particularly when lead contaminated soil may be a concern.

That doesn't mean every shoe is carrying something dangerous.

It means outside is outside.

I'm okay with not bringing the outside in.

2. Carpet Made Me Understand This on a Completely Different Level

Hard floors can be swept and mopped.

Carpet has a different personality.

Carpet collects things.

You may vacuum it, clean it and take care of it, but whatever gets walked into those fibers isn't as easy to see as dirt sitting on a kitchen floor.

That's a big reason shoes come off in my house.

I don't want someone walking across a parking lot and then grinding whatever was on that parking lot into the same carpet I'm walking across barefoot later that night.

That thought alone will make you look at your front door differently.

And yes, I know floors are floors.

Nobody is eating dinner directly off my carpet.

At least I hope not.

But I still want the place where I live to feel clean enough that I can take my shoes off and be comfortable.

3. I Learned That Floor Dust Doesn't Always Stay on the Floor

This was another reason my old habit started making even more sense.

I used to think of dirt on the floor as something that just sat there until somebody vacuumed it.

Apparently, it has plans.

Studies looking at indoor dust have found that walking can stir settled particles back into the air.

Now, I'm not walking around my house terrified to breathe.

That's not where I'm taking this.

For me, it's much more practical.

If I can reduce some of the dirt and dust coming into my carpet in the first place, why wouldn't I?

I'd rather stop some of it at the door than spend more time trying to get it back out.

4. I Understand the Rule Differently When I Think About Kids and Pets

Adults aren't usually probably sitting on the floor unless they need to.

Little kids are.

They sit there.

Crawl there.

Play there.

Drop something, pick it back up and somehow get it into their mouths before you've even finished saying, “Wait.”

Pets aren't exactly respecting the five second rule either.

That doesn't mean we can keep every germ or speck of dirt away from children and animals.

We can't, and trying would probably make all of us lose our minds.

But it makes sense to me that less outdoor dirt coming through the front door means less outdoor dirt ending up where everyone lives and plays.

I don't need my house to be perfect.

I just don't need the parking lot moving in with us.

5. Taking My Shoes Off Became Part of Coming Home

This is the part I didn't understand when I was a teenager.

There was something about taking those shoes off that separated outside from inside.

I wouldn't have described it that way back then.

But now I get it.

My home feels different from the rest of the world.

Outside, I'm walking through whatever the day gives me.

Inside, I want to loosen up.

Take off the shoes.

Get comfortable.

Walk through my house without thinking about what I've stepped in or on.

There is something very ordinary about it.

And maybe that's why I like it.

Not everything we do for ourselves has to be deep.

Sometimes I just want clean carpet.

That's the whole revelation.

6. Some Things Make More Sense Once the House Is Yours

I think this is what changed the most for me.

As a teenager, I was adapting to somebody else's way of doing things.

As an adult responsible for my own home, I understood why somebody might care.

When you're the one vacuuming the carpet, cleaning the floors, replacing things when they wear out and trying to keep your home comfortable, certain rules suddenly stop looking so unreasonable.

You're allowed to have preferences about your own space.

That includes asking people to take their shoes off.

I don't think that makes me rude.

I don't think people who wear shoes inside their homes are doing something terrible either.

We've all got our things.

Mine happens to start at the front door.

What I find interesting is that a habit I picked up years ago in another part of the world stayed with me because eventually it became my choice.

I understood it for myself.

And maybe that's the part I appreciate most.

There are things we're introduced to when we're younger that feel strange because they aren't ours yet.

Then life gives us enough experience to look at them again and say, “Okay. Now I get it.”

For me, taking my shoes off at the door is one of them.

My house doesn't have to be spotless.

Life is being lived here and lived in homes get messy.

But when I kick my shoes off, step onto my carpet and walk through my home barefoot, I like knowing I've left at least a little bit of the outside world where it belongs.

Right outside the door.

#EvolvingWomanhood

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