The Question Every Young Woman Should Ask Before Choosing Her Future

For as long as I can remember, there was one message that seemed to follow young people everywhere.

Go to college.

Get a degree.

Get a good job.

Be successful.

It was presented as the path.

Not a path.

The path.

And for a long time, most of us believed it.

I know I did.

But recently, after having three children graduate high school and begin making decisions about their futures, I found myself looking at that advice differently.

Not because college is bad.

Not because education isn't important.

But because the world my children are entering looks very different from the world many of us were told to prepare for.

I remember sitting around the table having conversation after conversation with my kids.

One of them knew exactly what they wanted to do.

The other two weren't sure.

And honestly, that changed everything.

When a young person knows they want to be a nurse, an engineer, an accountant, or work in healthcare, the conversation is fairly straightforward.

But when they don't know?

That's where things get complicated.

Because now we're talking about potentially spending tens or even hundreds of thousands of dollars to figure something out that could have been discovered a different way.

Those conversations became bigger than tuition.

Bigger than a diploma.

Bigger than just asking what job they wanted.

We started talking about life.

What kind of freedom did they want?

What kind of stress did they want?

What kind of income did they need?

What kind of future were they trying to build?

At the same time, social media added another layer.

Suddenly young adults aren't just looking at college, trade school, or getting a job.

They're watching people build online businesses.

They're seeing content creators make money.

They're seeing entrepreneurs work from laptops.

They're seeing opportunities that simply didn't exist when many of us were younger.

The options feel endless.

And sometimes that's the problem.

Too many options can feel just as overwhelming as having none.

I spent a lot of time researching because I wanted to help my children make decisions that would serve them years from now, not just make them happy in the moment.

I also wanted them to understand something I wish more young women were told.

Success doesn't look the same for everyone.

And that's where the old message starts to fall apart.

Because college is still an excellent choice for some people.

If a young woman wants to become a Nurse, Engineer, Accountant or work in many other healthcare fields, a degree often makes complete sense.

The numbers also support that.

The demand is there.

The earning potential is there.

The path is relatively clear.

But that's not true for every degree.

Today, many graduates leave school carrying significant student loan debt while entering job markets that are more competitive than ever.

Some spend years trying to find work in the field they studied.

Others discover they don't actually enjoy the career they spent years preparing for.

I don't think that means college failed them.

It means college isn't automatically the right answer just because it's college.

And I think that's a conversation more families need to have.

Then there's trade school.

I'll be honest.

I think trades deserve far more respect than they get.

When I was younger, skilled trades were treated like a backup plan.

Something people did if college didn't work out.

Today, that thinking feels outdated.

Electricians, HVAC technicians, dental hygienists, medical assistants, surgical technicians, plumbers, and many other skilled professionals are entering careers with little or no debt while earning strong incomes.

Many begin working years before their college counterparts.

Many are building financial stability while others are still sitting in classrooms.

Now don't get me wrong, that doesn't mean everyone should go into a trade either.

But it does mean we need to stop acting like success only comes with a four-year degree.

Because it doesn't.

Then there's entrepreneurship.

As someone who eventually built something of my own, I understand both the appeal and the reality.

Building a business can be very rewarding.

It can also be very stressful.

Social media often shows the highlights.

The freedom.

The flexibility.

The income.

What it doesn't always show are the long nights, the uncertainty, the mistakes, the self-doubt, and the months where you're working harder than ever while wondering if it's going to work.

Many businesses succeed.

But many don't.

The women who tend to do best aren't always the boldest.

They're often the most prepared.

The ones who build skills.

Save money.

Learn the market.

Test ideas.

And give themselves room to grow.

Then there is the path that rarely gets celebrated.

Going straight into the workforce.

I think this option gets overlooked a lot too.

For some young women, earning a paycheck immediately, gaining experience, building skills, and learning what they enjoy can be incredibly valuable.

There is something powerful about financial stability.

There is something powerful about learning while earning.

And sometimes a young woman discovers her future while working, not while sitting in a classroom.

The truth is, I've stopped asking which path sounds the most impressive.

I've started asking a different question.

What kind of life is this path helping build?

Because a degree isn't the goal.

Freedom is.

Peace is.

Stability is.

Fulfillment is.

Having options is.

The turning point for me happened during all those conversations with my children.

There was a lot of pressure from different directions.

At times, it felt like everyone had an opinion.

My ex-husband often wanted to make the decisions because he was the one paying for it.

That created challenges.

But I still did my research.

I still had my conversations with my children.

I still gave them the best guidance I could as their mother.

And what I realized was surprisingly simple.

The best path is rarely the one that makes other people happy.

It's the one that aligns with the life you're actually trying to create.

Not the life your friends are creating.

Not the life social media is showing you.

Not the life someone else expects you to live.

Your life.

If you're a young woman trying to decide what comes next, I don't think the question is whether college is better than trade school.

Or whether entrepreneurship is better than getting a job.

I think the real question is this:

What kind of future do you want to wake up to every day?

Because once you answer that honestly, the path often becomes much clearer.

Maybe not perfectly clear.

Life rarely works that way.

But clear enough to take the next step.

And sometimes that's all we really need.

#EvolvingWomanhood